Category Archives: divorce

new year

Here we are, at the end of a year again. My mom was so right when she would tell me that time moves so much faster the older you get. 2013 was definitely a year of change, self-discovery and growth. My partner of ten years moved out, we made the transition from one house for our kids to two houses and split time with each parent. We tried to make this transition as smooth as possible for our kids with a minimal amount of stress and they seem to have weathered the change well but I guess we’ll see in the years to come. After quitting smoking in December 2012, I started running at the Metrodome in January and by October, I ran my first half marathon. That’s 13.1 miles people. I’m damn proud of myself. Running has taught me so much about myself, but the most important thing I’ve learned from running is that I can do anything I set my mind to. Yes, yes, most of us grow up hearing this idea and being told it by parents, teachers, and mentors but it’s so amazing when you, yourself, actually figure that shit out! I also connected and reconnected with a handful of wonderful ladies who just make my world a much better place. I traveled and had adventures, got tattooed three times, saw some great live music (PRINCE!), ate a lot of great food, camped, drank, had good conversation and few bad conversations. Opened myself up to my emotions, cried a lot, laughed a lot and loved a lot.

To cap this amazing year off, tomorrow is a Major Life Change. I’ll write all about it tomorrow but just know, there is one more amazing (and maybe a bit terrifying) thing that will happen in 2013.

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I don’t do New Year’s Resolutions as I feel they tend to not really last so instead, I focus on goals. Some of my goals carry on from year to year until I can complete them, like Getting Out Of Debt, it feels like that one will last forever. But, I am making progress on that goal, my credit is great and my debt is very manageable. I will keep working on managing my debt, paying it down, moving forward and being more responsible with my money. I will, of course, keep running with the intention of running the Twin Cities Marathon in October. Baring any injuries, this will happen!

What I really really want to get a handle on is parenting my kids better. I had such a bad mommy moment yesterday during bath time, I wanted to cry after I apologized to my kids for losing it. ugh. It was horrible and frustrating and just not good. My poor kids deserve better than a screaming mommy monster when I’m feeling stressed. I take it out on them forgetting that they are just little kids with little kid brains and hearts and how scary it is when an adult and especially their mom, is yelling at them. So I guess I can call this goal the Stop Yelling At My Kids goal. (Unless they are in danger, then I’ll yell like crazy.) I feel like in this is something very important for me to get a handle on since it will effect the girls for the rest of their lives, how they parent, how they talk to themselves, how they interact with each other. No one deserves to be yelled at, yet we do it to kids all the time. They don’t deserve it either. They don’t deserve to be made to feel horrible or less than.

I want to live this year full of love and compassion. Here’s the a great 2014! *cheers*

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The idea of love

So I still get teary eyed and all tender hearted when it comes to weddings, even fictional ones. Sigh. I do still love the idea of love and of happily ever after. I’m not so cynical as to believe it doesn’t happen and I’ll never close my heart to it. But, I am very, very aware of the reality.


so that’s that

Well, yesterday, G and I had our hearing and we got our divorce. It’s not final until it’s all processed but the judge signed the order and it’s in the works. We high fived at the conclusion. hah. I’m glad we’ve been able to maintain a cordial, if not friendly, relationship through all of this and that the girls know they are well loved by their parents and will never feel they are in the middle of a push/pull war with mom and dad. Here’s to new beginnings for the both of us! cheers!


what a day

well, 10 years ago, I got married. today, I finished filling out the divorce paperwork.

I also started formulating a business plan. nothing that will happen any time soon, it’s at least two years out.

moving forward

one day at a time

i made an awesome anniversary dinner, steak, mashed baby red potatos and sauteed asparagus, onions and mushrooms. it was delicious. now i’m enjoying a whiskey ginger while i wait for Lu to fall asleep.

time for bed soon

what a day


also

today is our 10 year wedding anniversary.


the D

Divorce paperwork filled out.

having courts review before having G review and then we’ll file! wow.

 


no update in a while

nothing much to report, if you follow me on facebook, you’ll know things are going well, as well as they can be considering. I’m trying to get in some good quality time with my girls on my days off since I don’t see them for three days. they are always so happy to see me when I pick them up on Tuesday evening, it kinda breaks my heart. i’ve been extra emotional lately too. not sure what’s up with that. and goddamn,whiskey just makes me so weepy hahah so I’ve been sticking to beer when I want to have a drink or two.


Getting used to it

One of the hardest adjustments so far during this whole separation for me is getting use to being alone. I seem to do okay when I have the girls but on those nights they are with their dad, I have a hard time being alone in the house. I will get use to it though. I will learn that it’s okay be alone with just your thoughts. I will learn that I don’t need to be constantly around people or someone. And I will fine.